To marry or not to marry

Today, I had a talk with my mom.

Hi, for those who don’t know me, I’m Daniela and I’m a catholic girl who wants to move in with her boyfriend. When we started thinking about that, I dropped out of catholic teaching since church thinks it’s a sin.

My family doesn’t like the idea of me moving in with him without marriage, they say it’s against everything I’ve been teaching about. I come from a huge family of the north of the country. My mom has 5 brothers, 4 sisters, and my dad has 3 sisters… So far everyone is married and there’s not a single divorce… You’re getting why they think marriage is the answer. On the other hand my boyfriend comes from a medium family from the south, he has 2 uncles divorced, one of them twice.
The difference between a northern family and a southern family is that my boyfriend’s family isn’t catholic. Some do believe in God, but won’t go to church often, others don’t even believe in anything and my boyfriend didn’t get baptized because of that. That doesn’t mean he does not support me or hates God, he just doesn’t believe in it. He still respects me.

Back to the topic…. I had a talk with my mom… She asked me if I would consider get a 25€ wedding on church. Just… having the blessing and papers signed and be done with.

Why would I? It’s not the kind of wedding I want, nor the point of us moving together, nor I see anything wrong with it. If church accepts me dating a guy for 6 years and not being a virgin why would it care if I moved in with him and marrying later on? What difference does it make?

Why would a church not support me when I move in with the person I love and support me after I marry the same person? Is it the same if I would marry on paper with one person and later on marry ANOTHER person on church? Which is more sinful?

We ain’t gonna live together because it’s easier to get in bed… We are because we wanna commit, we wanna learn each other and then be sure if this is what we really want. I wanna marry the person who is gonna make me happy, I’m not marrying my community. Many marry because of those rules and are miserable later. It’s normal to be naive when you don’t have much examples on your family.

Times change, I’m not a woman from the bible. I work, I’m successful, independent, I was not made to be in the kitchen nor I know if I wanna grow a family

This isn’t even a God’s law… This is a pope’s one… And there’s a lot of things I think it’s wrong on our religion like homosexual couples being judge because they can’t procreate when a wife who can’t reproduce is not, or a wife who does not want to reproduce. Love is love, and I’m sharing it the true way. I didn’t do anything against God’s rules so I see nothing wrong with moving in with him. And I might be wrong or they might be wrong but we will only know that when we’re dead and gone. So I’m gonna do what my conscience tells me.

I have only one life, and I’m gonna be sure I’m happy!!


My name is Daniella and I kick and bite.